By Peter De Vries
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Extra info for Slouching Towards Kalamazoo
A close neighbor of ours in my North Dakota home town, which I will call Ulalume, considered a good night's sleep one from which he did not awaken with his feet on the pillow, and our mayor, not the nonesuch I've quoted about tightening the Bible Belt, but his predecessor, thought an administration well begun one in which he rose to deliver his inaugural address free of the delusion that he was wearing a tam-o'-shanter. My poor dear mother later went through a midlife crisis she might successfully have skirted had she not got wind of the expression, and, in consequence, the fashion.
Then she observed: “Your father's a very imposing man. He has the look of an actor. With that chiselled profile and that wavy iron-gray hair. In a sense he is an actor. ” “He's a great mimic. He does a marvelous God. And his Satan! ^Why don't you come some Christmas Eve and share the Christ'mas Carol with us,” I said, true to my habit of slipping in a little lubricant whenever I could. Any device to help me through a graduation thrown in doubt by my lack of classroom performance. I had been kept back a year in the seventh grade thanks to time spent reading Joyce and Proust that should have gone into homework, and so here I was in the eighth still, at age fifteen.
Half their daughters have probably had sex. ” she asked, and I fancied her eyes did now pause halfway in their upward glance, taking in my obvious condition. “Oh sure. Everybody objects to it more for the girls than the boys, even though it takes two to tango. ” “Never to be eradicated, because it's instinctive with the race, however unfair we might intellectually think it. The woman is regarded as the treasure, the object of desire,” she continued, after pausing long enough to squeeze some more antibiotic cream from the tube, and then to switch legs, “and therefore rates the term 'fallen,' which you would never apply to a man.
Slouching Towards Kalamazoo by Peter De Vries