Joe Tripician's The Official Alien Abductee's Handbook PDF

By Joe Tripician

ISBN-10: 0836227603

ISBN-13: 9780836227604

Extraterrestrials evidently have seeped into our attention. ultimately, in a hilarious send-up of self-help manuals, Emmy Award-winning writer Joe Tripician fearlessly tackles the full spectrumaliens, UFOs, real believers, govt deceptions and different issues paranormal. Peppered with evidence, conspiracies, opinion, and occasions too excellent to not be made up (but aren't).

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These intergalactic cruisers are apparently not as motivated by their love of humankind as they are by their need to breed. The alien's gene stock is thinly stretched, due to centuries of inbreeding more entrenched and traditional than an Ozark wedding. This makes them impatient lovers, forsaking foreplay for a more direct approach: anal probes, ejaculation pumps, and egg extractors. com/ But just because alien lovers equate sexual intimacy with a quick tune-up, it doesn't mean that they aren't hygienic.

Nestled securely in the heart of the alien mother ship, the Incubatorium is part high-tech hospital, part satanic fish farm. There is an operating table where the female abductee undergoes fetal extraction by two or three attending aliens. To make the mother more comfortable, a female handmaid (also an abductee) is usually present. ) 10 'fbe omcial Allen Abclucke'. com/ The aliens remove the fetus by placing between your legs a mechanical device that looks like a silver waterpick, but feels like a cast-iron vacuum cleaner.

Must own car, have large bank account, high cholesterol, and a weak hean. Slender, pretty, thirty-four-year-old SAAF who is URH looking for experienced and secure SAAM who is also URH. You must be able to match neurosis with denial, and emotional unavailability with chemical dependency. Medical insurance a plus. lID SIIKlRG WOraR Tall, dark, adventurous SAAM in love with life seeking SF for instruction, veneration, and desecration on the altar of my ET friends. Let's share and care together! Successful SAF businessman would love to form a long-term relationship with an insomniac nurse who loves cuddling, cooking, and bedside shotgun riding.

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The Official Alien Abductee's Handbook by Joe Tripician


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